Maybe lately you’ve been rejected by too many women or, worse, they didn’t even bother answering your messages.
[Insert no answer]
That can be frustrating, and I know this first-hand as I used to be that guy that didn’t get any answer from girls.
The problem still remains. Unless you learn how to engage women from the very first text, they’ll ruthlessly ignore you and go to the next interesting guy.

Now you’re probably thinking that in this article, I’m going to give you the classic advice of looking for some popular canned lines and randomly send them to girls.  

Well, what if there were much better ways to captivate women from the very first message so that they want to keep talking to you?

That’s what you’ll learn in this article, along with what’s outlined below.

What You'll Learn

    What Effective Opening Really Looks Like;
  • The Best Opener to Use when You Like Her;
  • 7 Statistically Proven Text that Always Work;
  • How to Progress the Conversation After The First Message;
  • Extra Bonus Tips;
Difficulty: Easy

You’ll find this article useful even if you have no idea of what to say to girls when texting them.

Typical Scenario

It's one of those days when you feel like chatting to girls. 

So you go through your contacts until you find a girl that you like. At that point, you're unsure of how to move on. 

Should I just say "hello"? Maybe comment something about her pictures. Or perhaps I should ask her some questions?

Amid the confusion, you end up doing nothing or, worse, dropping an opener to which she doesn't respond.

At that point, you feel so frustrated that you started to look for some tips on what to send as a first tinder message. 

That, eventually, brought you here.

That's Not a Love Story.

My First Message Got Ignored

This used to happen to me very often years back. I was very unaware of what attracted women. 

In reality, I didn’t even bother to research it. I just dropped the opener that “I felt was right” without considering for a second that, on the other part of the screen, there was a person.

This disconnection from women made me lose many opportunities. That was my standard opener.

[Insert Opener]

Then something clicked in my mind after having gotten enough rejections.

For the first time, I realized that I needed to use statistical models to understand what was working and what wasn’t.

This eventually brought me to experiment with openers of all kinds until I came up with a powerful series of conversation starters.

I began to share those with my friends that started to like and use them continuously.

Then, I shared those openers with my first clients that began to get the responses they desired from girls.

That was when I realized I had something of value to offer. 

You’ll learn how this story ended in a moment. For now let’s move on to your conversation starter tips.

Tip #1: Adapt The Opener to Your Goal

Every man starts with online dating for various reasons. Generally, those are amongst those 3:

  1. Finding a girlfriend

  2. Having Friends with Benefits

  3. Having as many Experiences as Possible

This means that you should base your opener on what final goal you have with online dating.


Because your opener is like your handshake. The first impression you’ll make that will inevitably impact much of her beliefs about you.

What openers should you use in the cases above?

1: To Find a Girlfriend

In that case, avoid using openers that hint at sexuality or intimacy. You’d prematurely bring the conversation to a place where it doesn’t need to go for the time being. 

[Insert Opener]

2: To Have Friends with Benefits 

In this case, using fun openers that don’t set anything specific is the best.


Because the best way to get friends with benefits is by keeping things as open as possible, preferably adding a “destiny” component to how things could go.

[Insert Opener]

3: To Get Random Experiences (ONS)

In that case, you can use more pushy openers. This doesn’t mean talking about sex right away, but if you can tease the girl or add a touch of flirt, you’ll set the right tone from the beginning.

[Insert Opener]

Try opening like that to see how powerful this sniper approach can be.

Tip #2: Imply Value

Another thing to ace your first Tinder message is by implying you’re a man of value from the very first lines. 

That’s because women are primarily turned on by men that have status, display competence, show confidence, expose themselves to vulnerability, and good genetic makeup. 

While you can’t really show genetic value through a message, you can certainly do so by hinting at status or competence signals.

Here are some examples of how you can do this:

Showing Status

[Insert Opener]

This opener clearly makes her understand that you’re not just a random guy.

Showing Competence

[Insert Opener]

Showing Confidence

[Insert Opener]

Exposing Vulnerably

[Insert Opener]

If you think about it, everybody goes after value. 

Even when you go after a woman you like or simply by reading up to this point in the article, it is because you believe there’s value to get.

Women look for many types of value signals in men. The ones outlined above are amongst the most fundamental. Make it so she perceives you’ve got money on the table, and you’ll ace your first Tinder message.

If I only applied the next principle I’m about to share with you, I would have gotten much better results with online dating. 

5 Ways to Ace your First Tinder Message (Steal My 21+ Powerful Lines)

Wayne Dyer

Real magic in relationships means an absence of judgment of others.

Once I started applying this principle I improved my intimate, friends and work relationships exponentially.

Tip #3: Make Her Sell Herself

That might seem like an unconventional tip for you, but here’s the thing: until you always try to impress women, you will never position yourself as that valuable.
In sales and marketing, a product is considered valuable when it draws you automatically instead of trying to be sold like cheap chips.

In your opinion, what do you think a woman will believe if you always try to push yourself?

She will automatically conclude that you’re not worthy enough, thus low value.

Look at this example.

[Sell Opener]

What is your perception of a guy that starts a conversation this way? Not very positive, I imagine.

What if, instead, you start your conversation in a way that makes her want to chase you?

That’s an example of this kind of opener, a qualifier opener, to be precise.

[Insert Opener]

Different feel, right? That’s it.

This counter-intuitive way of relating to women is what will eventually improve your results with them both online and live.

Don’t make the mistake of selling yourself short, and you’ll paradoxically see your results increasing exponentially.

5 Ways to Ace your First Tinder Message (Steal My 21+ Powerful Lines)

Tip #4: Show Empathy

Another great way to make an excellent first impression with your first tinder message is by showing empathy from the beginning.

Many guys, when starting conversations with girls, do something like this.

[Insert Bad Opener]

It looks like the guy can’t help but just get what he wants from her without acknowledging her reality. 

A much better and thoughtful approach would be to go to her profile and see what she likes doing in life.

Then craft a made opener from there. This will make her feel heard and understood. 

Look at this example.

[Insert Opener]

This conversation starter implies that the man has taken the time to go through her profile, showing interest in knowing more about her.

The advantage of such an approach are many:

  1. You don’t look needy

  2. You make her feel special

  3. You convey you can emphasize with her

Many women dream of a confident man, but that can understand them at the same time. 

Nowadays, men that are disconnected emotionally from women aren’t very trendy, especially in most developed first-world countries.

You can get a much more competitive advantage just by dropping empathy-based openers like this.

[Insert Opener]

Or like this.

[Insert Opener]

That will make her see you’re not a selfish bastard, waiting for her to be sexually exploited. And since most women don’t like being used as sex objects, you’ll impress her much more by showing that you’re acknowledging other aspects of her.

Now it’s time for the last tip. This will increase your opening rate by a very high percentage that I can’t even calculate; but trust me it’s going to be like that.

Empathy is the gateway to win a woman's heart.

Tip #5: Dopamine Release

A final trick I want to give you is consciously using her biochemistry to induce positive feelings in her towards you. 

You can do this by making her release dopamine from the very first message. 

Dopamine is a potent hormone that regulates the reward system in our brain. 

We usually get a dopamine kick after completing an important task or achieving something we deem necessary. 

The release of this hormone then starts to create a positive feedback loop that locks us into performing activities similar to the one that produced dopamine release in us.

Why am I telling you all those boring scientific stuff? Not because I have a Ph.D. in Neuroscience.

But neuroscience and dating are strictly related. If you want to improve your result with women, you must understand how to give them pleasure responses consistently.

There are many ways with which you can male the produce dopamine from the first Tinder message you'll send.

Here are some examples:

1: Make Her Laugh

According to scientific research, the easiest way to make a girl produce dopamine is by making her laugh.

Now, I understand that making girls laugh over text can be challenging for many guys. Still, it's not impossible, especially if you have a good sense of humor.

Look at this example.

[Insert Opener]

I made her laugh from the very first lines with a simple opener. Now she has a reasonable opinion of me, making it easier for me to proceed with the conversation.

2: Give Her a Plausible Compliment

Many men try to impress women by providing them with fake compliments. That's a problem, especially nowadays where everybody just copy-pastes lines from the most "expert" in the field.

I'm sorry to tell you that this doesn't work anymore as girls' defense mechanisms are so high that even the US Airforce can penetrate them.

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An awesome way to bypass her defense system against canned openers is by using a tailored-made, honest compliment.

That will make her see you're authentic with what you're saying, only if you say something plausible.

This means not telling a girl how fit she looks when all she displays are talents like this.

Do a favor to yourself and unmatch this girl. Then look for some hotter ones and drop them an honest compliment.

Let's say you find a girl that likes horse riding. You can tell her something like this.

[Insert Opener]

As you can see, the results will be much more powerful.

3: Use a Unique Opener

Science tells us how things we hear for the first time trigger a unique response in our brain, making it rerelease dopamine.

This suggests that if you can come up with new openers, she's never come across, you'll make her release dopamine in matters of seconds. 

How can you craft unique openers? By saying something that she's probably never heard before. This means avoiding making comments on her pictures or bio.

A good unique opener I use sometimes is the storytelling opener where I share something interesting that happened in my life.

Apart from being completely original, that's also a great way to engage women's fantasies and to share something of value without looking boring. 

That's an example of a storytelling opener in action.

[Insert Opener]

As you can see, it was great as a first Tinder message.

4: Call Her an “Easy Woman.”

An AMAZING way I found to captivate women immediately is by calling them "easy" from the very first message.

Look at this example.

[Insert Opener]

She reacted pretty bad, as you can see. 

Okay, this was a joke, even if the message was real. I later told the girl it was a social experiment.

[Insert Opener]

Now let's go on with the final opener you can use to ace your first Tinder message.

5: Use a Mystery Opener

Women are naturally attracted to mysteries, much more than men. This makes them want to uncover the secrets behind most men's lives and make each piece of the puzzle fall into place.

When you put a mystery element into your opener, you will sound much more exciting than the average guy that doesn't know how to make himself intriguing.

Look at this example.

[Insert Opener]

As you can see, the girl wanted to know about it so badly. I triggered her curiosity with one single move, making her chase after me. 

How The Story Ended

The Opener Dispenser

In the end, my openers were so successful that everybody in my circle of friends started to ask me to use them. Most of them also worked with live approaches. That's where I got most of my openers stolen indeed.

However, I was so happy with my friends, and clients' results were getting with those openers that I decided to collect the best of them in a free guide. 

You can download it here for free; before it gets so popular, I’d need to monetize it.

[Add Form]

Grab her attention first, then drop your bombs.

Bonus Tip!

Bonus Tip: The 2 Steps Opener

Aren’t you satisfied with what I’ve given you? Then learn about this opening technique that will get you answers 90%+ of the time.

I’m talking about the 2 steps opener.

It consists of dropping an opener that prompts her to respond to your first message.

After her answer, you’ll use a second line to spark her emotions.

Look at the example below.

[Insert Opener]

The first line sparked her curiosity, while I dropped the second one to engage her. 

Here’s another example.

[Insert Opener]

As you can see, this works reasonably well.

But, why have you done this Sal, couldn’t I just engage her from the start?

Sure, you could. However, she has already answered one of your messages was a subtle way to break the ice.

That’s a powerful way to make her used to answer to you until you keep sparking her emotions enough to make her yours. That’s what I teach in my Integral Text Game Course, by the way.

Wizard Takeaway

Give a good first impression and you won’t be forgotten.

Now you know enough openers to engage girls online and live.

If you believe this post was helpful, kindly share it!

Sal Damiata
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